Comments on Dating is Warfare: Bare Fingers

The whole ring vs. house downpayment thing is very...

2009-07-29T10:37:13.827-07:00

The whole ring vs. house downpayment thing is very real.... For some reason I've had that struggle in my head since I was like 17.

Every girl should have an engagement ring once the...

2009-07-28T11:28:23.721-07:00

Every girl should have an engagement ring once the initial dating stage is over then the ring is the next step

Ack - the ring thing - I think it's a source of co...

2009-07-28T06:29:41.224-07:00

Ack - the ring thing - I think it's a source of conflicted thinking for most grown, intelligent, fiscally responsible, women. It certainly was for me (and still is to some extent in my mid-engagement/wedding band not yet purchased stage). I agree w/ the other poster - give yourself a break. It's ok that you're conflicted, it's ok that you've changed your thinking (and it'll be ok if it changes again) and having nice nails does help show a ring off! It's also ok to want a ring, even if it's modest. Heck- even if it's a sterling silver cubic zirconia (there are some gorgeous fabulous fakes out there). I can tell you that the ring does make a difference, and it actually makes a difference in the guy's state of mind also (even if he doesn't necessarily think it will). And people will drive you crazy about it so just having to answer the 40 gazillion questions can be a test in and of itself. If you and WG want to get engaged and you want a ring of some kind you can even talk to a jeweler about ways to have a ring for your engagement that gets modified for your wedding, or traded in/up. My only piece of advice is to be honest about what you want - even if you feel conflicted. And let it be ok - whatever you want. Learning how to acknowledge and articulate what I really want, and then finding ways to negotiate solutions to those things with my now fiance has been the greatest preparation for marriage I can imagine - and I never saw it coming. And by the way - it sounds like there are very happy evolutions happening - I'm so glad to hear it!!

Elizabeth

Mimi - No, you didn't miss anything! Well, nothing...

2009-07-27T16:00:17.808-07:00

Mimi - No, you didn't miss anything! Well, nothing major anyway. I will write more about it soon, I promise. And yes, you sexy sexagenarians have all the luck!

Deirdre & Anon - I like the simple band idea and when I googled 'botanical eternity ring' saw some beautiful examples!

Everyone else...would love to hear what your "position" is!

I don't want an engagement ring at all. I do want...

2009-07-27T15:28:53.085-07:00

I don't want an engagement ring at all.

I do want a carved botanical eternity ring with small diamonds all around it. Not only are they pretty, but I prefer one ring and the symbolism of a band.

They also cost less, yet have impact.

I've never liked diamonds. And I've always just wa...

2009-07-27T13:55:59.764-07:00

I've never liked diamonds. And I've always just wanted a really simple silver band (no engraving)...

You're right, it is important to have a position on these things.

And I think you should give yourself a break.

My first thought: did I miss something? are you & ...

2009-07-27T10:07:52.836-07:00

My first thought: did I miss something? are you & WG engaged?!
or has some Important Conversation taken place that hasn't been reported in the blog?

My second thought: in this respect at least, sexagenarian courtship is easier than youthful courtship, that we don't need to worry about rings, engagements, weddings, or children...Heart problems, hearing, eyesight, osteoporosis, dental implants, yes!

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Ready to hear more about you & WG,,,