Comments on Dating is Warfare: Lighten Up

I agree...just GO. For all sorts of reasons: pract...

2011-11-07T06:58:53.303-08:00

I agree...just GO. For all sorts of reasons: practice, a night out, potential good conversation, etc. Just GO and come back and tell us about it.

Before I read this in the first comment, I was thi...

2011-11-03T22:16:21.274-07:00

Before I read this in the first comment, I was thinking, Practice! I often went on dates I doubted would get anywhere, just so I could have the date to look forward to, to get dressed for, and to think about. You need the practice (you = one, not you, DT). And maybe he's thinking of moving westward? You never know. Definitely go and have fun. I'm eager to hear about it. And remember, bad date = good copy.

xx Mimi

GO! You know why? Because he lives in Wisconsin....

2011-11-03T14:46:08.062-07:00

GO!

You know why?

Because he lives in Wisconsin. And he ain't meeting anyone there either. So he may be willing to work for it. Especially if he's in his thirties.

GO!

You know why?

Because while it may not turn into anything, just the idea of "possibility" makes us feel alive and full of fresh air. And if nothing else, it's so worth it just for that.

GO!

(& then tell us about it)

I'd definitely go on this date personally. I ...

2011-11-02T23:59:26.471-07:00

I'd definitely go on this date personally.

I have a couple male friends starting their 4th decade in life, and both of them are "sort of" dating 25-year olds. I asked them: why? Do you think it's going somewhere. They both replied: no, but it's a lot more fun dating the 25-year olds because there's an air of ease where the 30-somethings are so... oh I don't know, abrupt and uptight.

In the back of my head I thought: well of course we are abrupt. All the eligible men are either taken or dating 25-year olds. I don't have time like you do to dick around with someone whom I have no future with.

However, there is some truth about the air of ease. In the first two months of my joining OKC I went on 13 first dates, 2 resulted in second dates, and 1 third date. I knew from the get go that none of these 13 men would be in my future. Was it a waste of my time you asked? No, it would only be a waste of my time if I had prioritize these dates over friendships or family or dates with actual potentials. But I didn't.

I believe sitting at home waiting for the right one does cultivate some sort of negative aura. Instead, I go on dates, try to get something out of them, practice dealing with disappointment, practice how to be vulnerable yet at the same time not get too hurt.

Practice makes perfection. It applies in dating, too. So just go out and have a drink with the cutie. Practice your seduction techniques, practice how to have fun while knowing that there is no future. Because before Mr. Right comes, this is what we will have to do to stay sane.